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RSSEntirely Possible, She said “Cheese”
Feb 4
Uncategorized cripple, photo, witness No Comments
A few years ago, my hippy friend Kevin was attacked by a reversing Big Brown truck. To add insult to injury, I think the truck was delivering meat paties….or something. While in no way effecting his rugged good looks, it ultimately left him a cripple. Because he is my bro I lovingly tolerated the fact he couldn’t make me pizza for a protracted period of time and was always writhing in pain or going through Morphine withdrawal (what a drama queen).
Any ways, after Big Brown accused him of throwing himself at the innocently reversing truck in a vain attempt for media attention and sympathy (or something) and then wanting to go to court before they would pay for tylenol, things have been settled up.
How, you may ask, did the little hippy win out when pitched against Big Brown lawyers with lots of money and lots of experience in defending their more poorly trained drivers? Simple. Expert Witness. Me, Baby. Me.
My 17 minute testamony was clearly the shinning beacon of reason in their 4 week long court case. The highlight, when asked about the photo below by the powerful and capable Big Brown lawyer :
Big Brown Lawyer: “Why are you smiling in this photo?!!!!” – Dramatic pause to look at Jury so they can see that this whole case hinges on the fact that people sitting next to a cripple could smile. Clearly indicating things were fine and dandy.
Me, after being repeatedly told by the amazing, talented, and virtuous lawyer for the Cripple “Be somber”: “It is entirely possible my wife said to say “Cheese”".
Case over.
